Some days I look around at my life, and I stand humbled by all I have been given.
We went to mass today, and Magoo was glued to my side the entire time like usual. When it’s time to stand, she stands on the pew so she can see better, and she stands there with her hands in front of her in prayer, staring so intently at the priest. She looks forward most to the “Our Father” because she learned that prayer in school, and she is very proud to be able to say it along with everyone else. She gets excited shaking people’s hands at peace time, and she loves the recessional when she can wave to the priest. She has her favorite, and she gets so excited whenever she sees him.
And then when it is time to go up to Communion, TJ usually carries both girls. It’s a tradition of his. Ever since Magoo was born, he was pretty adamant about being the one to get to show her off take her up to Communion. And now it’s with both his girls. One in each arm. His chest puffed out. His face filled with an expression of such pride. As if he carries in his arms the two greatest blessings God has to offer. And perhaps he is.
Then there’s my little Goosie who soon will no longer be the runt of the pack. She has become quite the little talker. Just like her sister, the only time her mouth isn’t moving is when she’s asleep, and even then, we will often hear mutterings from the crib. She has such joy for life. Her smiles are so uninhibited, and she gives them so freely. And just recently, she has started walking up to me and giving me kisses out of the blue. Those first unasked for kisses from a little one are some of the most precious of my life.
And then finally there’s Baby Girl who will make her appearance sometime this winter (possibly earlier than we had planned due to an umbilical cord issue.) I had thought all along that she was a boy, so when the ultrasound tech said the words, “It’s a girl,” my jaw practically dropped. And then the tears came to my eyes. Three little girls. Already we had been blessed with so much, and now we will get to do it a third time. For the last twenty-two weeks, the pregnancy had seemed a bit abstract, and in that moment, it became real. And I felt my heart burst and fill to a level that I never even knew was possible. Our girls. I can’t wait until I can hold all three of them in my arms.
Today at mass, they read the story about the man who told Jesus he faithfully followed the Ten Commandments and he asked Jesus what more should he do. Jesus told him to sell all that he had, and then he could enter into the riches of Heaven. And the priest talked about how that is what we are all called to do… take everything we are given and give it away, and then we will truly be blessed.
And I looked at my girls and thought about the one still growing deep inside me, and I thought about how much we give as parents. We give until our bones ache and our eyes won’t stay open. We give of our bodies, and our spirits, and our love. And just when we think we have nothing left to give, we get an unexpected hug around our necks or a goopy little kiss, or we see a heart beat flickering on a computer screen, and it’s then that we realize we have more now than we did before we gave anything away at all.
Life is filled with blessings. They are everywhere we look. Some days we might have to search a little harder, but then there are days like today where we can’t help but trip over them. And for all of these gifts, I will be forever grateful.
“He placed an Angel in the palm of my hand
And for once in my life I obeyed His commands
I’ll take her and love her forever
Take care of her for life”
(Alabama, “Maker Said Take Her”)